How Movies Shape Our Understanding of Manhood

We all have favorite movies from our childhood, films that shaped our imagination and understanding of the world. But have you ever stopped to consider the messages these movies send, particularly about what it means to be a man?

The Tale of Two Movies: The Wizard of Oz vs. Modern Blockbusters

Think back to The Wizard of Oz. What's striking about this classic is its lack of violence and the prominence of female characters. Dorothy, Glinda, and even the Wicked Witch drive the narrative. Dorothy doesn't win by force; she wins by making friends and demonstrating leadership.

Now, compare that to many of today's blockbusters. While visually stunning and action-packed, they often fall into familiar tropes: a male hero defeats the villain, gets the girl, and saves the day. But what message does this send to young boys?

The Problem with "Dudes Fighting"

Why is there so much emphasis on force in the movies we show our children? While there's plenty of discussion about the impact of violent movies on girls, we need to consider how these narratives affect boys. Are we inadvertently teaching them that manhood is about defeating enemies and winning rewards, with little room for genuine relationships or emotional depth?

• Limited Role Models: Boys often see female characters relegated to supporting roles, existing primarily to reward the hero. This reinforces the idea that a woman's value lies in her relationship to a man.
• The "Quest" Narrative: Many movies focus on a lone male hero embarking on a quest, often involving violence. This can create a narrow definition of heroism, excluding qualities like cooperation, empathy, and communication.
• The Bechdel Test: A simple test to assess female representation in film. To pass, a movie must have at least two named female characters who talk to each other about something other than a man. Shockingly few movies pass this test, highlighting the lack of meaningful female interactions on screen.

Beyond Girl Power: Redefining Manhood

While empowering girls is crucial, we also need to actively redefine manhood for our sons. What does it mean to be a real man in the 21st century?

• Trust and Respect: A real man trusts and respects women, valuing their contributions and perspectives.
• Teamwork: He understands the importance of collaboration and is willing to be part of a team, even one led by women.
• Standing Up for What's Right: He challenges harmful behavior and actively opposes those who seek to abuse or demean women.

The Netflix Queue as a Tool for Change

As parents, we have the power to influence the media our children consume. By consciously selecting movies that pass the Bechdel test and feature strong, complex female characters, we can expose our sons to a broader range of role models and narratives.

It's time to move beyond the trope of the lone male hero and embrace stories that celebrate cooperation, empathy, and respect. Let's show our sons that true strength lies not in dominating others, but in building a better world together.

Let's seek out heroines who show real courage, who bring people together, and nudge our sons to identify with those heroines and to say, "I want to be on their team."

Ultimately, the goal is to raise sons who see women as equals, who value their contributions, and who are committed to creating a more just and equitable world for all.